It started as a child being brought up in a hostile and abusive setting. The threat of death and abandonment beatings and alcoholism. Nobody that I knew was having this kind of upbringing. I couldn’t relate to the other kids growing up. We were not allowed to watch or play hockey, unless we took martial arts.
Why? Because if someone takes a punch at you , use deadly force. Hence, an automatic different path than everyone else. My father had problems with the Mafia. I was raised in a household with guns and booze, and people coming over loading shotguns and pistols waiting for the attack . I learned that this life of mine was not ordinary. That’s the initial intro I was given. I adapted, I have a dark past, but in spite of all that, i wouldn’t trade my past with anyone . I’m free of all that